The Post that Jumped the Shark

You came here for some DIY, right?

I promised over there -> ….. in the sidebar… that I would share my DIY adventures.

This past month, I have DIYed my, um, butt off.

Don’t believe me? LOOK!.

I have enough completed projects for the next several posts: a powder room makeover, stairway runners, new floor and baseboards, and trimwork… (NONE of it in my own house, believe it or not).

PLUS... I finished my unexpected project using the fabric that I introduced in my last post.

This ACTUALLY happened: I completed a project In my house…within a month. You’re proud of me, aren’t you?

So…please, do not race to your UNSUBSCRIBE button when I tell you that THIS post does not contain ANY of that.

And with good reason:

Because I participate in the “Where Bloggers Live” group, I committed in advance to a different topic. Therefore, as a bribe for NOT unsubscribing, I am inviting you into the inner sanctum.

Read a SINGLE OTHER WORD PAST THIS POINT and we have an implied understanding:

You may NOT tell the rest of the world that I am a semi-certifiable weirdo. (I mean, if you’ve seen the pictures I’ve posted here, or here or here, that attribute already isn’t much of a secret. But let’s pretend it is, okay?)

If this is your first stop on the WBL roundup, this month we are discussing, “I Can’t Let Go of… (article of clothing or something in your home that is maybe past its expiration point but you just can’t let it go cuz of sentimental value).”

Whoo…. the mere potential of this post! Any therapists out there?

You already know about my sock bin.

BTW, I appreciated the suggestions to just let go and ditch it, but I didn’t. I raid it regularly, stuffing the socks with spent water bottles, then I let Roland have at them. I AM getting rid of the socks… just one by one, haha.

You likely won’t be surprised to find that I’m over-attached to plenty of things. I still have my Barbies, Dawn dolls

and sweet, dimpled Penny Brite:

Penny Brite doll
Penny Brite doll

My mother loooooved Penny Brite, and apparently thought she was an excellent role model for her only daughter, which is how I ended up looking like THIS on school picture day…

thus cementing my departure from any future yearbook inscription involving the words, cool or popular.

On the “Brite” side, things got better and I eventually took control of my own hair:

Also found in the basement archives… all of my record albums (which my son has been borrowing now that he is “into vinyl”).

And I saved the several matching dresses I made my girls when they were little in case they ever want to share them with their as yet non-existent little girls.

But none of that makes me weird, right (Penny Brite haircut excluded)?

Well, there’s one last weird thing I’ve saved that I am absolutely certain is not among the possessions of any woman my age…at least none that aren’t former circus performers.

(NO, I’m not, in case you were wondering).

Mister likes to ask me about it occasionally when cleaning the basement:

Mare, do you still want this?

YES! I want it.

Arrrrre you planning to use it.

Not today.

You know the kids don’t want it, right?

Yes.

Don’t you think it’s time to get rid of it?

NO!

Seriously, you don’t think maybe…

NO!

And THAT is why, in the back of the basement, past the Christmas and the Halloween decorations, behind the racks of luggage, next to the bins of family photos, we have …a unicycle.

As a kid, every year I circled it in the Sears Wishbook. Apparently, the wishing finally paid off, because it showed up under the Christmas tree sometime around seventh grade.

I envisioned the pre-purchase conversation going something like this:

Paul, Mary said she likes one of the boys in her class.

Really? Let’s buy her that unicycle. It’ll keep her busy AND make her virtually undateable.

Perfect! I’ll order it tomorrow.

Well, Mom and Dad, mission accomplished! “Unicycler” is VERY high up on the checklist for girl popularity.

I spent the next several months in our driveway, perched on the unicycle and hanging onto the fence for dear life. Then, one day, I was able to let go and weirdly pedal my way all around the neighborhood.

I was darn proud of my bizarre and obscure talent, aka the “cool repellant.” I can say with great certainty that no one was as impressed with my utterly sui generis talent as I was.

Over the years, I occasionally rediscover my one-wheeled friend still in the basement, usually by tripping over one of the pedals. Each time I see it, I sort of walk away from it reminded that there are plenty of things that are difficult to learn, but with time, determination, and practice, anyone can be a weirdo so many things that are difficult are not insurmountable (with the possible exception of operating the television).

Actually, this “talent” has been hidden long enough that I couldn’t say for sure if it continues to even BE on my resume of useless skills.

Are you wondering?

Because I am DEFINITELY wondering.

There’s only one way to find out…fingers crossed that there won’t be any broken bones. I think I’ve already reached my three per decade limit.

WARNING!!!! You can’t UNSEE this. Proceed with caution!

______________

What kind of long term relationships do you think my WBL friends have with their “stuff”? Check out:

Daenel at Living Outside the Stacks
Bettye at Fashion Schlub
Em at Dust and Doghair
Leslie at Once Upon a Time & Happily Ever After 
Iris at Iris’ Original Ramblings
Jodie at Jodie’s Touch of Style

Welcome to the monthly edition of Where Bloggers Live. It’s kind of like HGTV’s “Celebrities at Home,” but…Bloggers! Who doesn’t like to peek behind the scenes and see inside people’s homes? Over the next few months, a group of six bloggers will be sharing their workspaces, their homes, towns and more!

Make sure you visit everyone to see where the magic happens!

We will be happy to hear your thoughts

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